Some women become mothers without the realization of the mixed blessings or the responsibilities of the role they just got into. While motherhood brings joy to those who want it and understand what goes with it, it can bring depression to a lot of other women hence the term postpartum depression which occurs in about 10% of pregnancies within a few days or even month after delivery. Its prevalence rate is approximately 1 in 679 or 0.15% or 400,000 people in USA (Source: Postpartum Depression Fact Sheet).
Becoming a mother is a role that one should be mentally and psychologically prepared for. Unfortunately no matter how one prepares for motherhood, we are not always ready for the relentless crying, sleepless nights, unknown ailments etc that comes with the baby package. Some of us develop coping mechanisms, others research to be better informed, and others have a great support system. Whatever you have, some of the tips below will ensure that you understand what to expect as a new mother:
Arm yourself with information: with many resources out there, it is not difficult to find the issues you may be dealing with. While scouring the pages of books or website, remember you may be inundated with information overload. This can be contradictory and confusing, make sure that any information you receive and you want to try out is verified.
Do not compare yourself to the mother next door: you want your baby to have the best of toys/gadgets imaginable. Note that too much stuff does not result to the smartest kid on the block. Focus on the love and attention that your baby craves from only you and give that. Most of the toys will not be used and you will end up spending money unnecessary. Another area of worry for most new mothers is that the mother next door lost all baby weight within two months and you after six months post delivery are still struggling. Realize that all bodies are different; doing such comparison will only leave you more upset.
Comparing your baby to other babies: there is a reason that milestones are given a time frame. If your child does not walk at 10 months like your sister's son did, wait till at least 15 to 18 months before you hit the panic button. If your child did not talk at 18 months wait till at least two before you seek a speech therapist. I know more than one kid including mine that didn't really speak a lot till four years old and they are all doing well no.
Give yourself a break: you are not a supermom, and there is no award for that yet, till then you need to ensure that you not only take care of the baby, you also need to take care of yourself. Consider this, if you do not take care of your health or well being, who will take care of your family if something happens to you? To avoid being unhappy, make sure you schedule 'me times' for yourself.
Have a support group: when I had my second son, my support group which consists of a group of wonderful women helped me through the first month and above. I did not have family around me, these ladies ensured that I didn't have to worry about feeding my immediate family and concentrate on taking care of the baby. Your support group could be your family or your friends; they are also the people that can help you babysit so you can have time for yourself.
Prepare meals ahead: one tip that I learned and will definitely use if number three shows up is making meals ahead that will come in handy for 2-4 weeks after the birth of your child. If you have a large freezer, this is a great strategy to use. It frees your time to do other things and the rest of your family can just heat and serve without needing you. If you have to go back to work, preparing meals ahead and freezing ensures you eat homemade meals more often than processed or dining out. It is also okay to prepare baby food in batches and freeze to safe time when you need it most.
Whatever is the case, motherhood comes with a certain delight that is better experienced than told. There is no one size fits all method, do what you believe is best for your baby, you and your family.
Becoming a mother is a role that one should be mentally and psychologically prepared for. Unfortunately no matter how one prepares for motherhood, we are not always ready for the relentless crying, sleepless nights, unknown ailments etc that comes with the baby package. Some of us develop coping mechanisms, others research to be better informed, and others have a great support system. Whatever you have, some of the tips below will ensure that you understand what to expect as a new mother:
Arm yourself with information: with many resources out there, it is not difficult to find the issues you may be dealing with. While scouring the pages of books or website, remember you may be inundated with information overload. This can be contradictory and confusing, make sure that any information you receive and you want to try out is verified.
Do not compare yourself to the mother next door: you want your baby to have the best of toys/gadgets imaginable. Note that too much stuff does not result to the smartest kid on the block. Focus on the love and attention that your baby craves from only you and give that. Most of the toys will not be used and you will end up spending money unnecessary. Another area of worry for most new mothers is that the mother next door lost all baby weight within two months and you after six months post delivery are still struggling. Realize that all bodies are different; doing such comparison will only leave you more upset.
Comparing your baby to other babies: there is a reason that milestones are given a time frame. If your child does not walk at 10 months like your sister's son did, wait till at least 15 to 18 months before you hit the panic button. If your child did not talk at 18 months wait till at least two before you seek a speech therapist. I know more than one kid including mine that didn't really speak a lot till four years old and they are all doing well no.
Give yourself a break: you are not a supermom, and there is no award for that yet, till then you need to ensure that you not only take care of the baby, you also need to take care of yourself. Consider this, if you do not take care of your health or well being, who will take care of your family if something happens to you? To avoid being unhappy, make sure you schedule 'me times' for yourself.
Have a support group: when I had my second son, my support group which consists of a group of wonderful women helped me through the first month and above. I did not have family around me, these ladies ensured that I didn't have to worry about feeding my immediate family and concentrate on taking care of the baby. Your support group could be your family or your friends; they are also the people that can help you babysit so you can have time for yourself.
Prepare meals ahead: one tip that I learned and will definitely use if number three shows up is making meals ahead that will come in handy for 2-4 weeks after the birth of your child. If you have a large freezer, this is a great strategy to use. It frees your time to do other things and the rest of your family can just heat and serve without needing you. If you have to go back to work, preparing meals ahead and freezing ensures you eat homemade meals more often than processed or dining out. It is also okay to prepare baby food in batches and freeze to safe time when you need it most.
Whatever is the case, motherhood comes with a certain delight that is better experienced than told. There is no one size fits all method, do what you believe is best for your baby, you and your family.
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